And we have ceased fighting anything or anyone – even alcohol. For by this time sanity will have returned. We will seldom be interested in liquor. If tempted, we recoil from it as from a hot flame. We react sanely and normally, and we will find that this has happened automatically. We will see that our new attitude toward liquor has been given us without any thought or effort on our part. It just comes! That is the miracle of it. We are not fighting it, neither are we avoiding temptation. We feel as though we had been placed in a position of neutrality – safe and protected. We have not even sworn off. Instead, the problem has been removed. It does not exist for us. We are neither cocky nor are we afraid. That is our experience. That is how we react so long as we keep in fit spiritual condition.
Pg. 84 & 85 Alcoholics Anonymous
Apparently I walked into a room full of people whom have never read this part of our literature this afternoon, or had just skipped the tenth step altogether.
There are words I do not tolerate in the rooms. Terms such as “Just don’t drink” “Don’t drink between meetings” “Meeting makers make it”
When these terms are uttered out of desperation or a desire to sound intelligent or practiced in this program, I literally have got to leave. It’s what works for me right now. Because if I do open my mouth to try and inform someone (spiritually) that they may be not telling the truth, I will not pull it off the way I want. I want to be spiritual and calm and understanding and accepting and humble… but I want to punch them in the face more than that. And I must take my leave.
I find it offensive and in bad taste for a group of people who are supposed to be representing our fellowship to tell newcomers about something called “triggers”. Why would someone want to get sober, go through all of this difficult, grueling, tiring, embarrassing, sad bullshit (the steps) just to find out that the desire to drink can POP UP at any given time, whenever we listen to certain music or see a certain person or visit a certain place?
Certainly not an alcoholic. And I take it personally that an entire collection of people who are supposed to be sharing hope and a solution with newb jobs take it upon themselves to let the newcomer in on this lie that we are plagued by triggers for the rest of our lives.
What the fuck is a trigger? Life is going good, I’m walking down the street and all of a sudden I spot a hornet flying by and I’m paralyzed with the urge to drink because it reminds me of Mickey’s FINE MALT LIQUOR??? Well. I shall do my very best to stay in my house. Forever. And not watch TV… or listen to music… or talk to any person… ever again.
That doesn’t happen. We do the steps the best we can, leaving out nothing, we carry the message the best we can, as often as we can, we help others, we make it our lifestyle, and we don’t want to drink anymore. Truthfully. When a newcomer comes into a meeting I am chairing, the tenth step promises are what I read, and I share the miracle of the fact that I don’t want to drink anymore. I go through life, bad things happen, I have great friends and a wonderful fool-proof set of principles that help keep my head out of my ass and I don’t want to drink through it.
If you have triggers… maybe it’s time to find another sponsor who knows what they are doing and you need to do this work again and achieve a psychic change. Alcohol won’t bother you anymore no matter what—If you are doing the things you are supposed to be doing. If it bothers you when you see a certain commercial or hear a song and all you can think upon that moment is, “Wow, I suddenly want to drink!” something is wrong! There are no triggers, stop telling people there are, you are scaring new people and are misrepresenting this program. It is your responsibility to take care of your OWN “triggers” and keep it out of these rooms, there’s enough psycho-babble-bullshit going on in there as it is, we don’t need you talking about shit like that. Come on. Sorry. I’ll walk out now.